What is the magic of aging?
When I think of the future, I think about being the fashionable Kelly Rutherford, the well-read SJP and the carefree Tracee Ellis Ross.
Starting a new series, titled “Summer Diaries,” to be less formal than my reviews of ‘90s runways and more carefree than my analysis of fashion happenings. It’s similar to my blogs I wrote last summer, but with better writing (…I hope), anyways enjoy!
“Hya-lu-ronic acid... Hya-lu-ronic acid... Hya-lu-ronic acid...,” I repeat as the commercial, featuring actresses Eva Longoria and Amber Heard, fades after breaking down the key ingredient to L’Oréal’s new youthful serum.
“Seriously hydrates to replump skin in one week and reduces wrinkles for younger looking skin. Powerful results validated by dermatologists,” ended the advertisement.
Now, impressionable and adolescent Nylah didn’t understand or care to know why anti-aging products. Why the essence of longing to appear freshly 23 with no sight of crow’s feet mattered at all? Or, why people went through troubles of periodically obtaining surgical face lifts or brow lifts?
Don’t mistaken me here, I truly do believe in the “your body, your choice” phrase but it can be shocking (or bewildering) when notice your favorite celebrity pop on Instagram with a heavily filtered new face.
Then again, the basis for anti-aging is to promote products, treatments and procedures promised to reduce (or sometimes erase) insecurities of the consumers as they try to upkeep with everchanging societal beauty standards.
As Vox reported on in 2022, “Whatever the tone, the goal remains the same: to remind consumers they’re not comfortable with aging and prompt them to spend money accordingly.”
“We’ve learned to pretend to celebrate older women, but we haven’t learned to accept what happens naturally to their skin. We celebrate older women but not the un-intervened-upon face. This fuels a multibillion-dollar cosmetic and skin care industry dedicated to helping people — mainly women — stay young, or rather, try to look like it.”
I can’t fault the women who’ve been pushed and pressured by patriarchal and purity expectations to appear flawless, and gravity-defying enter beauty stores seeking a product to assist with such performance.
However, as I get older, I slowly realize the beauty of aging whilst allowing the cycle of life take the reins of what happens to my facial features. I consume content from personas who pride themselves of posting in their authentic body and face regardless of how it’d be perceived.
I think of Lisa Corbo, a 63-year-old fashion influencer with less than 500k followers on TikTok, post about her chic and cool outfits. It’s hard to say what trend or aesthetic Corbo would fall under, but it’s inspiring to watch a woman in her years still look forward to putting on her best fit while strutting aimlessly around Paris and New York.
“It's been my experience that a lot of women do feel defeated and overwhelmed by getting dressed as they age,” she told Newsweek.” “Naturally, I recognize I am older, but it will never dictate my style or love of fashion.”
If it’s not meandering through the big streets of the big city, then it’s posing in my apartment building’s mirror-lined elevator. Kelly Rutherford, actress of Gossip Girl (2007), does it best when she’s capturing selfies of her ‘OOTD’ in her elevator rides.
“It was not so intentional of, ‘Oh, I’m going to start taking pictures in an elevator.’ Honestly, the reason I do it nowadays is it’s convenient. I know the lighting, it’s easy, I’m in and out of that elevator, and I thought: ‘This is the perfect little light box,’” Rutherford explained to Elle.
And if it isn’t her fresh and innovative outfits that leaves me awed, then it’s her ability to always appear graceful. “I think as I’ve gotten older, I find that I feel better with less [products,]” the 56-year-old told Vogue last year. “It feels younger, fresher, and obviously if you want to add a little glamour, you add a deep red lip, which works especially well in the evening.”
Something that really encapsulates the epitome of aging gracefully is that one picture of Tracee Ellis Ross. The one where she’s holding a glass while smizing into the camera. It exudes a sense of unbothered, peace and rich, basically my ultimate dream. And perhaps, this says more about I how want my life to look when I reach my 50s and childless.
“You’re just in your body and it’s really hard but what I love about it is you feel so beautiful, sexy, long and strong—and that’s all the things I want to feel. You feel connected to your body—you can’t do Tracy Anderson if you don’t have the mind-body connection,” Ross spoke of her wellness routine to British Vogue.
Another picture that ran circles around my brain is the one where Sarah Jessica Parker, star of Sex and the City (1998), poses with her elbow on a stack of books that she’s read while prepping for the 2025 Booker Prize panel.
While it’s just a picture, I think it’s something that I can’t exactly describe why it means everything to me. It’s the subtle flex of reading two books in a day, the shelves stocked full of other books, the casual pose, and the small smirk with the deepening smile lines.
“And sometimes, if there’s a collagen serum, I’ll use that. I like the idea of collagen, but it has to be thin and move around the face. I don’t like anything with a silicone base because I like my skin to feel like my skin,” Parker shared with British Vogue.
Like Parker, the all-time beautiful and never-aging actress Nia Long also agrees with the sentiment. “I don't do anti-aging things, or use products because I think I look old or am trying to avoid aging," she told People Magazine in 2022. “I use products to stay healthy and to keep healthy, vibrant skin. There's a difference.”
“I am a proud 51, and eventually I'm going to age in a way where it's obvious and I want it to happen beautifully and gracefully. I don't really want the pressure of feeling like I have to be beautiful and perfect because I think beauty comes at any age,” she said.
It’s sometimes shocking to hear when women, especially Hollywood-working women, stand by their natural aging features. Society often contradicts itself when it wants a woman to be au naturel yet exist to perform in manners only deemed perfect by the masses, such as undergoing surgery or excessively exercising to achieve near-impossible physiques. Surely at some point, such women I mentioned earlier may’ve found themselves on the second side of societal expectations but aged into the notion of performing authentically for themselves.
Then again, these women are undeniably wealthy and could access skincare products costing more than my biweekly grocery bill. The women are their own narrators to their life, and how they announce it through interviews sometimes lie in a two-fold scenario. On one hand, it is true genetics and expensive skincare serums can play a sole factor on aging gracefully. On the other, there’s a wondering gap whether the women use a secret treatment to achieve a well-lived-in skin and lifestyle.
And the question here is: Does the magic of aging gracefully with a skincare routine lie in the state of using a 350-dollar hydrating moisturizer?
But the other question I ultimately ask myself is: Am I really looking forward to aging? Or rather the prospect of being rich and aging just so?
I have to remind myself that there’s nothing wrong with wanting security and freedom. Whether it’s reading two books a day without interruptions or snapping selfies with hefty shopping bags in hand. Though, these things come with time, and it is of the essence to be patient and live life in the now rather than later.
Song of choice: “JUST FOR FUN” by Beyoncé and Willie Jones. It’s about time I add a Beyoncé song, let alone a Cowboy Carter track. This song is one of my favorite songs off the Grammy-winning album, not just because it’s slower tempo but also because it’s written by one of my favorite songwriters/artist, Ryan Beatty. Butttt if you want to know my favorite CC song, I’d go with “FLAMENCO,” can’t explain it. Just listen to it and trust me.